There are many ways to describe it but it is really hard to nail it down. Call it swagger, call it confidence, call it passion or maybe heart – whatever you name it, it is essential to the sales relationship. In his recent book, To sell is Human, Dan Pink (one of my favorites!) calls it buoyancy – the ability to respond and recover and retain our spirit in the face of difficulty, disappointment and even (the worst!) derision.
This phenomenon is closely allied to what is known as EQ – emotional intelligence. Seems like a bit of an oxymoron doesn’t it – intelligent emotions? But it is precisely the value of experience and maturity – the ability to overcome our ancestral tendency to run our perception through an emotional filter (how do I feel about it) before processing in our frontal lobe and then, finally, sending it on to our rational decision making brain department. Learning to better manage this trek from experience to reaction is the key to finding the door to the secret (and sacred) inner chamber called confidence.
Currently reading a great book on the topic – Emotional Intelligence 2.0 – really good, simple descriptions and insights along with practical suggestions on improving the ability to be more effective in managing this inner journey. A mentor from long ago once told me – “You can only go as far out there as you go in here (your own heart)”. Sage advice for a world in changes!